Author: Beast Xeno

The Currents of Wyrd

Beast Xeno

Wyrd is an odd word, it looks like “word” and sounds like “weird”. Yet… Wyrd is the underlying fabric of the Nine Worlds and one of the central concepts of Druwydry. The rudimentary definition is something like “the course of events” or ” The Cosmic Fates”. A more intuitive understanding might be “what is to come”. In Druwydry, Wyrd represents the powerful currents of influence that control how events unfold in linear time. It is possible to displace the flow of Wyrd that is revealed through a specific alignment of The Mastery and Deed.

A Self-Centric Eye (the Master I)

Every Western institution over the past 100 years has been designed to manufacture “sleepers” that obey. This happens because the Magians and Puritans idealize putting others above ourselves. This is a monumental err. Literally putting the cart before the horse and then putting full cup blinkers on it. Selflessness benefits none in the long term and only benefits opportunistically in the short term.

Deep down, everyone knows this is true. Self-centrism is extremely frowned upon, yet everyone practices it and dresses it up in the disguise of selflessness. By becoming self-centric, you begin to pay attention and become sensitive to what impacts you directly. Developing a deeper understanding of what influences you and in what way. Without that understanding you are a vessel adrift without anchor or sail undoubtedly heading towards the rapids and rocks. Torn and shredded pieces are destined to settle into the river bed, somewhere downstream.

A correction is in order. It is necessary to embrace self as priority and in this begin the seeding of essence. What grows from the seeds? An authentic understanding of who you are, where you are, what you like, and what motivates you. This is the fundamental basis of self-remembering. Creating awareness simultaneously of what is known and the knower. Awareness of the deed and the doer.

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

We are taught the results of being self-centric is devastating and destructive. Somehow it is corrosive to our collective relationships. Self-centrism is falsely construed as selfishness. In accordance, it is thought that it creates no contribution to the “greater society at large”. Yet a survey of the landscape tells a different story.

The wretched who care only about themselves seem to live forever. The ruthless businessman gets richer and more powerful. The self-obsessed athlete becomes the best in his game. The politician rises in his influence and reach. In a very real sense Satan is King of this World. The nature of this world is adversarial and the road to hell is always paved with good intentions

Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy, Pride. All said to be deadly Sins. However in a controlled and deliberate use, we are led to the path of freedom and prosperity. Lust leads to the fulfillment of sexual needs. Gluttony brings forth a fullness of living. Envy creates motivation and drive to improve your station. Pride brings a focus to constantly refine and develop the self. Greed to financial fulfillment. Wrath to justice. Sloth to emancipation from fruitless labor.

Perilously Traverse the Currents of Wyrd

We live in a dangerous world. Everything is surely trying to kill us, even Destiny herself. Nythra will not be denied. Yet under the Moonlight, there’s a winding staircase that leads to the blue room of Mars. It is here in The Dark Pools that we can divine the Currents of Wyrd. Given we have the foresight, that is the occult abilities to; chart our course along the ebbs and flows of the Great River as it’s rushing.

We can apprehend Cosmic Emanation, as we see the spring forming the Dark Pool. It begins to stream outwardly. The stream eventually feeding into the Great River. I close this entry with a quote from Magister Hagur. May your Travels be by your revealed Wyrd.

“Shugara, highly developed intellectually and greatly motivated achieves objectivity wherever he is found, bringing about the deep sinister intent. The Dark God is influenced by the planets Moon and Mars, responding to their attraction, ever ready to transmit its energies to all those contemplating the Tree of Wyrd as a way of sinister living, and this means:

(1) Endeavouring to arrive at an absolute sinister motive.

(2) The ability to enter in the silence of the chaotic mind to realise the sinister way.

(3) Remembering at all time the strict self-disciplined life, which
does not mean that life is undone of sensual perception, on the contrary it does stir up a well-balanced dark life.

(4) Using self-control facing the unknown.

(5) Not to scatter innate sinister forces vainly, but focus them to a particular sinister goal. “ – Hagur

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Eminent Mind – Developing the “Master I” Through Meditations

Beast Xeno

I have owed my readers this article for a very long time now. I have assumed that those that practice Druwydry also have meditative practices. As a standalone practice, meditation is an effective tool for gaining further control of your being. Its beneficial properties occur both immediately and gradually. Though I encourage all forms of meditation, there are specific types that I find more suited to our aims.

For the purposes of this text, I will focus on 4 forms of meditation. Creative, Guided, Moving and Transformative. The first three are relatively widely practiced meditations, and the fourth is, in my eyes, an experimental form. It is important to understand that each of these will create and strengthen both the core (common) and specific benefits and should be ritually performed on a daily basis.

Before we can further explore the different forms of meditations, we must first define meditation. Meditation is a mental exercise involving awareness, clarity, control, and focus. Mental, meaning mind or consciousness.

Druwydry views consciousness as a myriad of cognitive subprocesses that are overlapping and yet interconnected-like working in unison. These individual subprocesses are referred to as “small I’s”. For the magians and sleepers, these individual subprocesses occur as impulses and are acted upon in an unimpeded fashion almost entirely subconsciously.

The designation “small I” uses “I” as shorthand, both for the nominative singular pronoun with which we refer to ourselves, and it also refers to an influencer. More specifically an internal influencer (impulse). That little voice that pipes up to let us know to fill one of our basic needs, such as homeostasis; is an internal influencer, and therefore a “small I”.

Other examples of impulses are behaviors, emotions, and physical reactions. Many of which we aren’t even aware of as we are acting upon them. These influencers can be self catalyzed. However, a great many of them are stimulated by what Druwydry refers to as “Master I’s”. “Master I” is shorthand for an external influencer. There are far too many of these to attempt to provide a categorical breakdown for the sake of brevity. This is a subject that I will explore in future writings.

One of the aims of Druwydry, is to provide a path to strengthening essence and Influence. Essence is the trifold enigmatic composite being that is distinctly referred to as self. Which exists as a perpetual experience of consciousness, physicality, and the more mysterious energy that animates the other two thirds. A strong essence is capable of reigning in the impulses, and exerting decisive control over all influencers. Whether they are internal or external holds little to no consequence.

Influence in this context, is the ability to assert our will upon the external and internal planes. Through these four types of meditations, we enter the first of the three sacred triangles; The Mastery. The Mastery aims to subjugate our many “small I’s”, and consciously select which of the multitude of “Master I’s”; we resist or succumb to and at what intensity.

The Four Meditations

Most have a specific image in their mind whenever the word comes up. An image of some holy man or monk sitting with their legs crossed and palms turned upwards. They are sitting perfectly still, in perfect silence, and eyes closed. For some this is an effective means of meditation, but for our work there’s more to do than simply calibrate the machine.

I would like to establish a base meditation. This is a Guided Meditation set. The following are two forms that have been designed by Theo Hiraeth with Druwydry in mind. Léargas creates a foundation in meditation, energy work, visualization, and nature
connection of the spiritual practices for Druwydry.

Léargas by Theo Hiraeth

Form I: Earth (day)

Find a tranquil woodland area and remove your upper attire. Position your back flat against the ground and outstretch your arms, proceeding to dig your fingers into the soil and keep them in place.

Close your eyes and visualise your mind’s eye breathing out as you inhale; breathing in as you exhale. Tune into the sounds around you, try to listen for the groaning of the trees, then visualise their roots growing and spreading beneath you.

Visualise the soil slowly transmuting into a black liquid, as it pulls you downwards into the earth, into the subterranean valley inhabited by luminescent Mycelium. Take a moment to accept the numinous reality of your situation, the sheer chthonic beauty and intrinsic symphony of it all. Listen for the sound of distant flowing water; listen as it grows louder and louder, and louder still, until you witness it submerge everything in the chthonic valley, and finally, yourself.

Allow the water to push you upwards to the surface whence you came, feel yourself being pushed through the soil, born into the world again.

Open your eyes and gaze at the canopies of the trees, until you are ready to return to your feet, and to yourself.

Form II: Water (night)

Locate a body of clean, natural water. Wade into it with your arms slightly outstretched beside you and your fingers parted. Feel the pull of the water as it slips through your fingers. Splash water onto your face, then run your fingers over your head.

Submerge yourself deeper in the water, thereby allowing the water to reach the chest, then the neck, then the lower half of the face, ensuring that breathing through the nose is still possible.

Cease all movement and close your eyes, then perform the reverse breathing technique (Form I: Earth, paragraph
2).

Visualise the soil on the banks of the water turning to sludge and filtering into the water: bare witness as it changes the colour of the water, subjecting it to a certain alchemical process, transforming it into the Dark Pool wherein sinister knowledge is sought.

Remain submerged until it feels like the ‘right time’ to leave the water and return to yourself, changed.


The Provocation of Psyche

Léargas (Irish Gaelic) translates as an awakening; realisation, of the nature of things and is a fitting name for a Guided Meditation practice. Guided meditations function as a doorway to awareness, connection, and reflection. Where the Guided Form leaves off the Transformative Form picks up. There are both subtle and distinct differences between the two meditative forms. Usually the Guided Form is focused on a sort of recalibration of the machine. The Transformative Form aims to create a change within the “operating system”.

I have experimented quite a bit in this arena. From sonic (auditory) attempts to alter the state of mind and disposition, to designing a mediation that’s intention is to create a “berserker” state to be summoned and desisted at will. No matter the outcome of these experiments. There has been a net positive benefit to them. It is my belief that the Slyman should work to cultivate these types of occult abilities.

In this way the provocation of the psyche is necessitated to ultimately develop a certain type of “weaponry”. By learning about transformations and then attempting to transform any given component of self, we develop a skill set which will become essential in our workings. This is one form of an alchemical season and a crucial part of developing the Dark Empath.

Theo Hiraeth designed a wonderful transformative meditation, to which I will link here. I think what I like most about this particular working, is that in a very real way, he connects you to the elementals in a very primal way. Giving the exercise several forms.

Alignments of Being

Have you ever been working on something and zeroed your attention to whatever it is you’re working on? Everything flows so smoothly and it all seems to fall into its place at just the right time. You might even think to yourself, “I’m really good at this“. For a brief time, it is as if, this is what you were always meant to do. What you have experienced, I call a Creative Form of meditation.

If practiced and employed often, we begin to notice what will seem to be supra-human abilities. What’s more fascinating than that is, it will manifest in ways that don’t seem connected at all. Though that sounds fantastical, what I mean is in a very practical sense. Learn to reach this state within the art of communication/manipulation and witness your power.

Those that we see who seem to possess supra-human abilities are all accessing this state. There is much to observe about the creative state of being. This subject has been robustly flushed out by greater minds than my own. To that end, I will leave it where it lies.

What I might add to this, is that what is transpiring is an alignment of Will and Deed. When mind-body-lifeforce align, we experience a hyper state. This is in itself a connection to divinity. A complete illustration of the “Master I”.

I will save talking about Moving Forms for a planned essay on Gurdjieff’s Dance.

-Beast Xeno

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Nochtadh Cosmaí – Further into Cosmic Revelation

Beast Xeno3 Comments

Recently a YouTuber asked me if I was a Satanist. It’s been a long time since I was asked that question. I answered in the affirmative, and elaborated in it by stating in the most proactive sense of the term. In retrospect, this answer doesn’t take it far enough. So I thought I might try to flush it out more here. So let’s go ahead and devil into this.

There are 3 things to know about my Satanism. First as I see it, there truly cannot be an -ism when it comes to what is Satanic. After all, how does one practice Satan? What kind of system is Satan? What is Satan’s philosophy exactly?

Satan means Adversary, Accuser, Enemy, and One who plots against. Why not just call it Adversarialism or even Enemyism? Perhaps that is because our mind associates more then Adversity or plotting to it.

There are aspects beyond those that come to mind. Think about this, what does the word Satan invoke? In a nutshell, the first thing you should know about my Satanism is that it is not Satanism. It is Diabolism.

Diabolism places us firmly in the second thing to know. What is Satanic, is the observable state of nature. That is to say, it is the natural worldly order. We as terrestrial beings are part of this order. The simplest thing I can point to that illustrates this is the food chain.

There are many other examples of what makes it the state of nature. To further investigate this, I will point you to two titles; the Lucifer Principle by Howard Bloom and Postmodern Satanism by Jason King. Both in my opinion are essential reads.

It is undeniably obvious life is a competition for resources. There is not a species on this cosmic dirt ball, that doesn’t participate. The end game is simple, survive and thrive. What it means to thrive can sound atrocious to a naive mind. Yet it remains the natural worldly order.

In the natural worldly order, what can be reduced to simply thriving; will be labeled monstrous or heinous. As the saying goes, one man’s hell is another’s heaven. The devilish ranks of which swell with each passing day.

Since I was a boy, I have pondered the thin-lined divide of Devil/Satan/Lucifer. Are they separate entities? Is it the same being going by different aliases? I wonder is it something different entirely? Religions seem to reveal more of our nature, than answer any eternal questions. Leaving us with dissatisfaction and dogma. For this while the cat is away, the mice will play.

In keeping true to the natural worldly order; king of the hill is the favorite game to play. It is a no-holds-barred free-for-all with only one rule. The rule is “There can only be one”.

As one ascends to his metaphorical throne, he then basks in his Luciferian glory and grandeur. The next comes along and casts him down to take the throne. Each one proclaiming not to be unlike the most high.

Thus the Morning Star is born to RISE. It can only be fitting that in the same way, all things must strive. One above and one below, a balance is stuck. The enemy can now be perceived.

This brings me about to face the third understanding. Those who take the mantle of Diablo, pledge to be the counter-weight. Tasked by the natural worldly order to perpetuate it’s delicate balance. Lest we stagnant and erode into extinction.

Sorry for the brevity. Just some things on my mind.

-Nine

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Nochtadh Cosmaí

Beast Xeno

The Sinister Creed

Satan in particular and the Dark Gods in general are a means to self-fulfillment and self-
understanding.

Only by journeying through the darkness within us and without can we attain self-divinity and
thus fulfil the potentiality of our existence.

Our rites, ceremonies and practices are all life-affirming, and show us the ecstasy of existence
and the self-overcoming of the true Adept.

We are feared because we defy and seek to know and thus understand. We rejoice in living: in all
its pleasures but most particularly in its possibilities. We thus extend the frontiers of evolution
while others sleep or cry.

We detest all that enervates and would rather die than submit to anyone or anything – this pride is
the pride of Satan, and Satan is a symbol of our defiance and a sign of our life-enhancing energy.
Others see our way of living and our way of dying and are afraid.

When we hate we hate openly and with arrogance, and when we love, we love with a passion to
match this arrogance: always mindful never to love anyone so much that we cannot see them die,
for death is a natural changing of energies.

We prepare – through our magick and our ways of living – for the Age of Fire (the Aeon of the
Dark Gods) which is to come, when we elitist few shall reach out toward the stars and the galaxies and the new challenges they will bring.

Our way is difficult and dangerous and is for the few who can truly defy the matrix of illusions of ‘good’ and ‘evil’ – that stifle the potentiality of our being.

What does not kill us, makes us stronger.

Codex Saerus – The Order of Nine Angles

As the world around us violently changes, I am reminded of the lobster in the boiling pot. The rich have become nothing but richer, and the poor are only poorer. The masses are so caught up in the little manufactured achievements bestowed upon them. So blinded; so stupid. Men are so emasculated and women are no longer truly venerated. Gender has become something only identified with, and is no longer celebrated or even taboo. One might think to themselves “what strides of social equality have been achieved”, but to me that begs the question; what did it cost us?

I am a person who rarely apologizes, but if any of what I am saying offends you; I am truly sorry. You see, I harbor no phobias in this topic and if it should sound as such; well tough shit, all you will get is an apology from me for it. I am all about becoming who you truly are. If this means you are something other than the once “societal standard”; by all means embrace it. Keep in mind though, I am of the old school of thought; where we do not peek over our neighbor’s fences. So when I speak on these matters, understand that I am not coming from a place of bigoted mind. The only reason, I have chosen to bring this up is, because I believe we are being robbed of something essential and this demonstrates it adequately.

What I mean is this, when I was a small child, life hit me with a series of unfortunate events. I was first stricken sick as an infant. That left me with a massive hearing loss. A short time later, my father passed away in an accident. This left my mother extremely poor and emotionally in despair. She was pregnant at the time of his passing. I went through more than several years of abuse at the hands of my step-family. Mental, physical, and sexual; its like Prego “it’s in there”. By the time I hit the ages of 11-13, my somewhat shy and self-conscious demeanor had culminated into a seemingly magnetic target for bullying. This is the part of the story, where someone should have come to my rescue, and it isn’t. No hero came, no one stuck up for me. The school didn’t care, the police gave even less of a shit.

What transpired instead was a cosmic test of mettle. You see I was born determined. Each event listed I overcame; I rose above it. By the age of 14, I knew who I truly was and nothing was going to hold me down. None of the disadvantages I inherited, would make me take a knee. I had taken on the mantra of, “Why? Because fuck you, that’s why!”. I am my own champion. A warrior within my own rite! The bullies, I bullied them. The abuse I suffered, I let it be the kindling of my internal fire. The deafness, you would have no idea it is there if I did not say so.

Understand this now, I AM NOT SPECIAL! There is nothing about me beyond my defiance and determination that made it possible to overcome. Which is what finally brings me to the impetus and thrust of this entry. “Only by journeying through the darkness within us and without can we attain self-divinity and thus fulfil the potentiality of our existence.” The Sinister Creed gives us 9 points with a singular energy, the thrust to defy and overcome.

It used to be that people of different sexual orientations had to undergo a very personal quest of self-discovery and self-empowerment. So I think, those that did so will understand where I am coming from with this. It should not just be handed to you. You will miss out on everything that truly gives self power and strength. Sure there are those that will succumb and fail, not all are worthy of truly living (in my views, not all are worthy of life). Each must pass the tests of living to be worthy of doing so. Those we coddle, we do them no service. We may love them, but we must be willing to watch them die. This is the Law of Nature, it always has been. This is a cosmic revelation, yet has been no kept secret.

So in that, what do I mean by cosmic revelation? When we look into nature what we see is constantly repeating patterns. Fractals if you will. What happens on a microscopic level, seems to also happen on larger and larger scales. The Law of Nature is no different. In the same way, that a seedling planted on the shadyside of a tree has to struggle and overcome to survive; so must we endure to survive.

With all of the solar storm activity in the news lately, it should also be apparent that the same condition exists on that level. There is in fact, a delicate balance struck in nature. Some of which we can see and comprehend, the rest though the pattern remains elusive.

To be continued…

-BX

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Undertow – The Currents of Influence

Beast Xeno

For far too long, we have suppressed the whole of our beings. We do so by our own volition. We recklessly submit to erroneous and often purposely imposed influences. In that submission; we deny ourselves evolution. We fail to see the pitfall of not developing our full body. Claiming we are a unique being. Yet going along with the herd at the same time. A marionette of mundanes. Throughout this site, you will find tools which can be used to cut these strings.

Remember it is said, “If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything.”

Carefully choosing what influences you, will greatly impact the character of your being. We are living organisms. It stands to reason that, what we intake (IE.. Nutrition, chemical infusion, etc.) will directly augment what we output. In following this to its entirety, we discover a universal principle of causal effect.

When we discuss it at this level of psycho-physiology (termed here ‘the meta’); we are examining a parallel concept to what G.I. Gurdjieff spoke of as identification. Allowing the transition from Man #1 #2 #3 into #4 or #5 and then sequentially #6 and #7.

It can be understood that Man 1-2-3 and 4 are “In Time”, with Man #5 being the pinnacle of what is possible “In Time”. #6 and #7 are then respectively “Against Time” and “Above Time”. These ideas reflect a kind of echo of the 7FW and Hermetic Traditions. Predisposing the initiate to specific influences and catalyzing the meta change.

“The Dark Gods, who in deepest secret entity are powers of the Unconsciousness whether personal or collective, seated in it as in their proper home, are in their knowledge “sinister-truth-conscious” and in their action possessed of the “seer-will”. Their unconscious force turned towards chaos evoking works and dark creation is possessed and guided by a perfect and direct knowledge of the thing to be done, its essence and its law,a knowledge which determines a whole effective will-power that does not deviate or falter in its process or in its result, but expresses and fulfils spontaneously and inevitably in the act that which is seen in their energy.”

– Magister Hagur

In the quote above, we can recognize that Hagur is describing something which can be understood as the law of influence. We can recognize what might be vectored as the ‘hand of the Dark Gods” in the statement. Allowing the Work of the dark creation to flow through the unconscious into action. He even assigns categories, personal or collective. Which we can liken to scales of alchemy. The internal alchemy of the psychonaut and the external alchemy (sorcery) of the cosmonaut.

Sorcery is like alchemy in that it is about understanding the polarizations of opposing forces. Recognizing where they attract and where they repel, and then ascending above them at just the right moment, so that you might put a hand in their direction. That you might influence the current.

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Introduction to The House of Iconoclasts

Beast Xeno

Statement of Intent:

The House of Iconoclasts exists to establish a noble fraternal lodge in the 21st century. The House of Iconoclasts will herein be referred to as either the Noble House or simply as 9AO. The Noble House will exact a measure of personal, philosophical, physical, societal, and spiritual achievements. The Noble House and its methods, standards, and practices are intended to be exclusive to its members (herein referred to as kinfolk). 9AO operates firstly on the principle of merit. None can enter the Noble House without earning it. It should be known that among the kinfolk of the Noble House there will be true fellowship and solidarity.

We seek to elevate and enrich the well-being of what we understand to be three sacred triangles. The Mastery, The Architecture, and The Mystery which are the rudimentary names given to each triangle. By developing these we seek to evolve what it means to be human and become something more. 

What are the three sacred triangles?

  • The Mastery = Mind/Body/Life-force
  • The Architecture = Family/Culture/Opus
  • The Mystery = Purpose/Integration/ Virtue

What is Excellence of Self?

  • Fidelity
  •  Honour
  • Prestige
  • Endurance
  • Essence
  • Strength
  • Balance
  • Empathy
  • Wisdom

What is Excellence in Society?

  • Adherence
  • Autonomy
  • Development
  • Fraternity 
  • Liberty
  • Productivity
  • Prosperity
  • Pursuit
  • Security

Excellence requires dedication and tenacity, but yields tremendous focus and fulfillment. The Noble House recognizes concepts such as “happiness and peace” as the unattainable myths they are. The Noble House elevates conquest and purpose to stand in their place. After all, a happy beggar is still a beggar nonetheless. Our kinfolk choose war and chaos. We celebrate the Magical Operation known to us as Darkhorse. This Darkhorse provides our methodology and strategy in part.

Our aims? To transform the core of our being and manifest a more authentically human; human being. To infiltrate, infest, and ultimately infect. Giving rise to an authentic humanity; unbroken and unindoctrinated. The superior Iconoclast. 

Iconoclast means “image breaking” especially in the context of self, religion, culture, and politics. If there is a sacred cow; it must be sacrificed. It is only through the immersion of self into these forms and the eventually shedding of them, that we truly can see the whole of their lessons. Thus the deeper gnosis of shape-shifting begins to culminate into an evolved understanding. As we undergo the shifts, it becomes more and more difficult to relate to the Puritan and the Magian.. This gives rise to the need for fraternity and belonging. 

There is a place for you. It isn’t automatically granted to you. Yet it is attainable and within reach. The end goal? To manifest this in the living world abroad. 

We’ll talk more about this at a later time. 

-TC Downey / Beast Xeno

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Becoming Human

Beast Xeno

Identity, it is what we spend most of the first part of our lives discovering. In certain esoteric schools, we are taught that it is a facade built to interface with the rest of the world. We can choose from a vast library of predefined components, then mix & match them, until we have arrived at the unique “me”. Our perfect little snowflake, the individual personality. Welcome to the “Build-a-Bear” of our human psyche. A literal xerox existence.

We see the same traits manifest throughout all of history. Each occurrence is a slightly less authentic copy of the earlier iterations. Defining ourselves by answering simple multiple choice questions like, “am I a cat person or a dog person?”. We lose ourselves in the madness of mimicry. The very skill that facilitates some of the necessary components of higher learning can act as a trapdoor. Disconnecting from the potential for discovering some type of genuine authenticity. At the same time, losing the sense of completion in our being.

How then do we become whole again? Can we discover the more natural version of “self”? Will we persevere in striking the delicate balance between the primal beastly animal and our divinity of emergent intellectuality? More concisely, can we evolve?

I look to the more traditional times, before the distortion and corruption seeped in, poisoning our collective prana. As a people, we faced the unknown darkness, as it threatened all around us. Emerging from deep within us. These were the days of tempering and trial. The ancient forge of the gods.

There is a sentiment appearing as a catastrophic phenomena. This phenomenon is rampant and spreading like rot does. There is a difficulty in bringing to light the full impact and implications of such atrophy. Atrophy taking a prohibitory form, divorcing the “I’s” within us. Forcing a denial of self, whether be it through law, manufactured morality, or social acceptance. All forms of repression.

In reality, we are biologically an ecosphere. Striking systematic balances on a myriad of delicate vectors. The simplest example of this that I can think of, is the gradual measure of Glycaemia. Where the absence/abundance of glucoses can have substantial consequences. If left unadulterated, one would either adapt or succumb to it. This type of occurrence is multi-tiered, and often simultaneously acting. That is the natural worldly order.

It is in understanding this, that I can experience a kind of empathy. An understanding that nothing is forever, nor has equal chances of survival. It is the nature of this world that we are pitted against the whole. Not just on the external, but most profoundly within ourselves. Most strikingly, we become aware that as time sifts through the hourglass, the distortion magnifies.

Somewhere in our quest towards divinity, we lost touch with our authenticity. What must be undergone to regain this, will require the loss of conceptual superiority. You cannot become the overman when you are barely a man to begin with. Reasoning then distinctly places us with the task of becoming human.

Human, not just in the rediscovery of the lost beast within, but in our socializations. While the rest of the Western civilization is debating on what gender they identify as, we find ourselves questioning what is so corrupt to have brought us to this point.

-TC Downey

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Be Hungry…

Beast Xeno2 Comments

China 2004, I was sitting across a table from the Vice President of the multi-million dollar fireworks company I worked for. We had just finished satisfying our most carnal desires and had settled in for brandy and a cigar. Before this journey, it was my belief that this gentleman was not fond of me. Some years prior, I had stated my opinion of errors I had noted with the company to him. He did not seem to take my criticism well at that time. I began questioning him as to why he had asked me to take this trip, in consideration of my harsh critique.

He began rambling about his brother’s (his brother owns the company) sons and that they would surely run the company into the ground when they inherit it. He talked about how his brother had given and continued to give them anything and everything they wanted. At this point, I wondered if this was all the brandy talking, I soon found out it was not. He said, “They just aren’t hungry!” He began telling me of all kinds of underhanded and tactical things that his brother and he had employed to get to where they are today. He then said, “We were hungry, you’ve got to be hungry or your perspective dulls.” His insistence was repeatedly on this ‘hunger’ giving a person an edge. The hunger motivated them, forcing them to be creative and struggle towards over-coming every obstacle they cross.

He then made it known to me, “This is why you were selected; you’re hungry. I knew from the moment you opened your mouth that day; your interests were not in vulgarly complaining about our methods. You were seeking improvement which would benefit YOU, and just as much as it did us. This is what my nephews lack and what is vital for ANYTHING to succeed and grow.” From there our conversations shifted from serious to more of what we would try next, since we could have anything we wanted.

That year, I received over $150 dollars a week in raise and a considerable amount of attention within the company. For the next few years, I spent a lot of time flying back and forth between China, Corporate, and business related conventions. Every year, I received a considerable amount of increase in salary. Then suddenly it stopped, no longer was I being groomed to be at the top of this company. What had changed?

One evening, as I set at home pondering all of this, I realized I was no longer hungry. I looked around at all the toys and gizmos. I saw the 500 an ounce bag of ‘dro’ and the expensive bottle of liquor. All the things, I just had to have to keep up with the Jones’. This was a particularly bad time in my life; my obsession with material gain had manifested a monster of problems, which I could not seem to fix. My son’s mother and I were on the out. It was any day coming she would be leaving and with my son. So many of our arguments were because I would spend my time ‘making money’ and she felt I had lost sight of what was important.

To be fair to myself, I honestly sought to better the lives of our family. I had however become too comfortable. Understand that I am not placing this as the sole reason for the complexities of problems I was facing, but it WAS a dominant Influence of them. Tsun Tzu advocated that an animal (or man) backed into a corner, would fight fiercely for his life and surmount unthinkable feats. I had forgotten this. So much of my time spent investing in ventures, which I only half-heartedly wished to succeed, that I was blind to the things, which surely make men great.

This is why I choose a minimalist lifestyle. I keep only the things, which matter the most to me and indulge only in the things, which I see a more developed gain. I threw away or gave away everything which I had no need for in my life. In my eyes, they were mere symbols of laziness and comfort, lulling me back into a sediment condition.

When asked, “Why people choose to live a life of wanting for nothing”….

I answer, “”When the only thing you are, are the social status symbols you’ve gathered, it speaks volumes in itself about how empty and useless you’ve become.” I will further this by saying “In a world full of gluttonous sheep, too busy chasing the next high, feeling, fad, and Ithing (IE.. IPhone) to realize they are enslaved by it. I am YOUR Adversary!”

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I, Devil

Beast Xeno

Even if man were nothing but a piano key, even if this were proved to him by natural science and mathematics, even then he would not become reasonable, but would purposely do something perverse out of sheer ingratitude, simply to have his own way…then, after all, perhaps only by his curse will he attain his object, that is, really convince himself that he is a man and not a piano key! If you say that all this, too, can be calculated and tabulated…then man would purposely go mad in order to be rid of reason and have his own way.

–Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Today, I am going to disappoint you. This entry will let you down, and won’t be what you think it is to be. I have no intention of defining or revealing some aspect of the history of Satan, Lucifer, or “The Devil”. If you’d like to read something extremely thoughtful and well written to that end; Please check out Chloe 352’s article in Nexion Zine 7.1 titled “Notes on Satanism“. My aim is set to convey something of a different species , and to that I am certain to fail. None the less, I shall endure.

First I think it is important to nutshell my worldview. That my fellow traveler, will be no easy task. I probably, in my life time, could never write enough to paint the entire picture for you. Even if I spent 20 hours a day for the rest of my life. So I am going to try to sum it up in a few concepts. The first an allegory. The second is three quotes. The third a transgression. So let’s begin shall we?

When I first came across the thought experiment called “Schrodinger’s Cat”, I immediately understood the concept being related. The short of it; a cat sealed in box with poison. To observer, until the box is opened there is no way to determine if the cat is alive or dead. Therefore it remains in a superposition; that is both alive and dead. blah, blah, blah; not what I’m after. This is just where my thought experiment started. See it was irking me that the cat was a continuous observer and therefore the experiment was flawed.

The Allegory

I started thinking about my experience, if I was the cat. I realized as the cat, I was first intrigued. What cat doesn’t like a box? After the lid closed, I might be a little frightened. I would probably go looking for a way out, and in the process discover the poison. I am certain my heightened and attuned sense of smell would, I hope, clue me into the fact that I didn’t want to be in the box with this stuff. Then panic would set in, after all, it is just what nature does. After an undefined period of time, I would start to take for granted that this noxiousness was contained. Leaving me unaffected by it. Should enough time pass, I may even have convinced myself that the poison was not meant for me. After all, I am a good cat.

As my stay grows longer, so does my boredom. Fortunately this box is many sided and walled with mirrors on every side. In every direction, I can see many different cats. Each reacts as I act. Most of them, I think of as friends. Not the one directly in front of me. He keeps staring at me. To me this is a sign of aggression. We all spend our days playing and talking. Lately the conversations have become a bit more “heady”. We began to discuss how we got here and what we think will eventually happen. One of my friends on the right side, he is concerned about the poison. It is his opinion, that eventually it will open and kill us all. A few on the left side think, he is just being dramatic, and he should just stick to the evidence and what we know from experience. They argue an awful lot and sometimes that just stresses me out. I like to hold conversations with one of the cats above me. He is always making some profound statement with lofty ideals. He has me convinced that the cat in front of me isn’t actually being aggressive toward me, but rather is simply just as unsure of me, as I am of him. This might be true, because he does share a lot of my same features. Maybe I’ll give him a chance.

One day, I got curious about something puzzling. I decided to ask the cat above me about it. Being he is above me, he will know the answer. So I asked him, “What is out there, beyond what I can see?”. “Surely, since you are above me you can see further”. “Oh my!” he replied and grew silent for a very long time afterwards. Finally he said “I cannot honestly answer that question, but maybe if we can figure out what is going on inside what we can see; we will know more about the beyond”. Agreeing with him, I decided to get every cat here on the same page. The more the merrier right? Instead of two on a quest to understand the beyond, we will have the thinking power of many. After that every cat eventually joined our quest for this knowledge. Some of our discoveries seemed earth moving and awe-inspiring. Yet none seemed to answer the question of the beyond. Finally what was always meant to be happened, the poison released.

Yes, this is the kind of thing that regularly plays out in my head. No, you shouldn’t be concerned for me either. You see there are (like the mirrors) many different aspects of this that really do sum up my world view. We are similar to the cat inside a box. Driven by fear and insecurity. Without out a real knowledge of what’s beyond our reasoning of anything immeasurable or observable. Distorted. Isolated. Removed from the true nature of our world, it’s cosmos, and a healthy perspective on exactly how ignorant we really are on a universal level. As a society, we know 2 things with all certainty; we live (cat) and we die (poison). Only do we really even know that? What if this is merely some instance of whatever animates (cosmic life) finding itself in a super-position? What if it is then diverging as it is being observed not simply in one instance. but both simultaneously (mirrors again)? The question of what is observing come into play. I think maybe its reality itself, but I digress. We simply just don’t know and anyone who says they do is just full of shit. No matter the level of science involved, at this point: it is still just mental masturbation.

Any working “universal” theory is a bust. No dice. What about on a cosmic level? Here we have some grasp of different principles and ‘laws’. There is still an air of primitiveness to it, in my assessment. We have 6 senses in which we can exact and analyze any type of ‘knowing’. Our proximity and access seem to be the biggest obstacles in real advancement. Until such a time as we can move closer to proper examination; I just don’t see us moving beyond that, except by painstaking fractal to fractal. Cosmic Kindergarteners.

The Three Quotes

“The world as we find it is undeniably adversarial. Or, in other words, undeniably Satanic.”

-Jason King – Post Modern Satanism

“When a mind is enlightened, it casts shadows onto the subconscious. Truly the more enlightened the mind, the darker the shadows we find.”

-T.C. Downey – I, Devil (right here)

I won’t devote a great deal of time regurgitating King’s philosophical workings. I recognize his salient gleaning of this characteristic of our world in the above quote from Post Modern Satanism. Seemingly there is a constant competition for resource and survival. There are simple examples like several closely rooted plants which are competing for nutrient, pollination, soil, sunlight, and water. This is further rigorously tested by things like insect infestations, climatic conditions, fires, mold, moss, people, and whatever other things I’m forgetting to list. There are so many phenomenal examples present in our worldscape; you couldn’t possibly list them all and remain sane. King loved to use the “lion and the gazelle”, I think because it could be over simplified and still hold weight as ‘the‘ example. It would seem the more we look at the compounded environmental difficulties faced by any organism on this planet; the more that seem to factor in. There can be no doubt that nature is in fact against itself. Undeniable? You bet. Satanic?

In that sense, Satan is the king of this world! This easily becomes a realization, and then immediately is followed by doubt. Because it is hard to face up to reality. The notion that literally everything is out to get us, comes with denial, paranoia, and a myriad psychological mechanisms. Quickly one forgets that the odds are stacked against us, and those things which remain in existence today; do so in defiance of the natural worldly order. Kind of inspiring to me. A nice little balancer to a rather nihilistic overture. Nature has its system of balances. To this affect, it seems necessary for a heavily destructive tendency to aid in the preservation of the whole. This comes across as shear chaos at first glance; observable however is the emergent order from within.

Clearly we have fooled ourselves into believing that our ‘intellect’ somehow sets us apart from the natural worldly order. These days people must feel alien to this worldly order. How can they not? We have rampant menticide and an inflated sense of self-entitlement that is contrasted with restrictive pushes for passivity and compliance; let us just say it is obvious world war 3 is going to be a global killer. How can it not be? Free-range capitalism has saturated every aspect of life with corruption and distortion. I used to be one of those guys who thinks “democracy = freedom”. Now that I am older, I recognize that that statement couldn’t be farther from the truth.

All democracy does is allow the despicable and unworthy to manipulate and further distort the masses. While we are busy playing our oversized Monopoly TM game, it is obvious we are missing more critical events on a global scale. We fail to look at them in any honest or objective manner. For those that might actually be honest and objective; we are forced to hold a heavy skepticism, for they could be doing so with financially tinted lens. Anyone arguing the merits of any particular ‘sciences’ had better be the far most expert in their field, or sit the fuck down. I don’t care where you are getting your information from, these facts remain. People lie. All the time. Governments lie. No surprise there. Spin is an ancient craft that has been honed and perfected since its inception. The Sheeple (mundanes) love them for it.

Recently the point was made to me that what society is lacking is any true sense of patriotism. To that I had to agree, but I posited that the body of governments should take more pride in their people. You see any relationship, should it be harmonious, is a two way street. Give AND take.

“This is not a matter of compromises or adaptations. The power of a new Middle Ages is needed. A change, interior as well as exterior, of barbaric purity is required. Philosophy, “culture”, everyday politics: no more of all that. It is not a matter of shifting to the other side of this bed of agony. It is a matter of finally waking up, and standing on one’s feet.”

-Julius Evola

The Transgression

News Flash! You are not simply entitled to be a live. This natural worldly order does NOT owe a thing to you. In fact, most of you should be put to death. If for no other reason, because you arrogantly assume the entitlement. To further complicate the issue, not only do you think you are entitled, but you are of the opinion that your entitlement is just; whereas another’s is ludicrous. From one side of your face you cry about the injustices of society, and from the other you are equally as dishonourable and contriving. Eager to step over the wake of carnage to receive your metaphorical kudos. Where have all the heroics gone? Have we lost the drive to push ourselves to the highest versions of self? Why has the mantra of “For king and country” been replaced with the motto “live to fight another day”? Do you see it? Can you comprehend? There is glory in dying for ‘higher’ principles, and a deep felt appreciation from those for which you fight. Dedication and loyalty are quickly slipping into the hallowed crypts of antiquity. Where is your pride in heritage and tradition? What is it in a highschool or college diploma? A mediocre job, where most of your focus is making money or worse a name for somebody else?

Mankind is so emancipated from the natural worldly order, and this makes it seem inevitable that we will face extinction. How could we not? We cannot possibly understand the value of life, if we are not willing to die for it. There is no way to grasp the preciousness of enlightenment, if we cannot embrace the darkness behind it. With that for each egalitarian neutering that socially arises; nature will send a brutal killer to cleanse its palette. So for this, I truly am sorry to disappoint you. None the less, I shall endure!

-Beast Xeno (edited on 08/09/21 to improve conceptualization and readability)

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